Contributing writer for The Thicc's Money Issue.
Credit Card Payment: $0; I* closed all of my credit accounts when I lost my job in fashion last year. *I didn’t close them. Capital One closed them. Mind your own business.
Cell Phone: $95
Rent: $650 (This is unheard of, and I live in South Central—please stop moving here. I beg of you.)
Utilities: About $65 a month. I have four roommates.
-Audible (I don’t want it but forgot to cancel a trial and you lose all of your credits if you cancel!!!)
-I also have a few magazine subscriptions like the New Yorker and Food Network
Magazine. I like to buy them when they’re on sale on Amazon!
Transportation: $568.75. I don’t own a car and fully realize I could with how much I spend on Ubers. Again: mind your own business.
All Other Monthly Expenses
Pet Insurance: $64.97
Occupation: Receptionist/Writer/Freelance Social Media Consultant (Basically, I majored in journalism in college.)
Location: Los Angeles, CA
My Salary: About $21,000, as I only work part-time. A lot of my spending money comes from Poshmark sales, my Patreon, and freelance social media work.
My Paycheck Amount (Bi-weekly): About $800–$1,000, depending on how many Jade face rollers I can shill. I also have a Patreon for my book, which brings in about $290 every month, and I bring in another $200–300 a month from freelance work if I’m lucky and Mercury isn’t in retrograde.
Health Insurance: $0 (Don’t tell the Republicans)
Student Loan Payment: $0 (I owe about $40K with interest and get them deferred. I think that year in the south of France was worth it???)
Sunday: I open at work today and by the grace of God wake up early enough to take an Uber Express Pool to get to work, which makes things much cheaper than when I’m rushing out the door and have to take an UberX. I don’t really give myself too much credit because I forgot breakfast and lunch, so I grab a Subway croissant. I also donate to a Twitter pal’s GoFundMe to replace her laptop and go to Erewhon, which is my arch nemesis in supermarket form, TWICE and also buy a Groupon for Brandless because I’ve been wanting to try it for a while and have no self-control. Since the day has already spiraled out of control, I take an UberX home and also treat myself to late-night Taco Bell. $99.19
Monday: I don’t work Monday–Wednesday, which is great because I can work on my book and list old clothes on Poshmark. I run to CVS to buy some cleaning supplies for the house along with tampons, tequila, and a new bottle of Seche Vite. $57.32
Tuesday: I sincerely don’t leave the house today and get a lot of writing done, which doesn’t stop MoviePass, the greatest scam I’ve ever heard of, from charging me for the subscription I canceled like two months ago. $9.95
Wednesday: I have a Sallie Mae savings account and it’s set up to automatically transfer money each week. It’s probably the only good financial decision I’ve ever made even though it’s not much. Squarespace also sneaks up on me and charges me for my ~*custom Gmail*~ account. $15
Thursday: My rent is due on the 15th instead of the 1st; it sounds cool in theory but it’s actually the worst and I’m still getting used to budgeting for it like a normal person (see: my Monday). I walk to the post office to get a money order, and also close at work today so I have enough time to use my trusty, money-saving pal, Uber Express Pool. I haven’t gone grocery shopping in a while because I’m reckless and live life on the edge, so I grab some chips near my job. I take an Uber Express Pool home and don’t have to worry about spending anymore on food because I’ve recently decided to give intermittent fasting a try. $681.98
Friday: I work again today. I’ve finally stopped living in luxury and bring lunch and take Uber Express Pool to and from work. (She’s learning!) $18.99
Saturday: I was scheduled to work but had to call in last minute due to a housing situation (never have roommates) and don’t spend anything. Google had other plans for me and my storage plan. $1.99
Sunday: I’m off this Sunday, so no need to Uber anywhere! I finally shake down my roommates and collect money for our internet bill and pay it/change the password back for them to use it. (Again, never have roommates.) I run to CVS again because I need more tequila, sunscreen, and laundry detergent. I also order some Juul pods on Postmates because I don’t live near a gas station that sells them and I found a free delivery promo code I found on Reddit. $73.96